Understanding a woman's feeling

Aiya........I hope this would be the last post of the "love-marriage" series. My last post seems to have a little controversy. Some people agree with "my opinion". And some people don't understand at all. Well, about the 'polygamy' post, I really didn't mean to hurt the feeling of kaum hawa. Yes, polygamy is not wrong. But most women don't agree with it at all. I'm trying to imagine myself as a woman when I'm writing this post.(yarkh......terase mcm bapok paun la pulak)

Can I accept a polygamy? Hell no!!! What would I do if my husband wants to polygamy? First I will try to find is there anything wrong with me that would cause him to do so. If there is nothing wrong with me, definitely, the problem came from him (dasar lelaki miang!!!). Why I hate polygamy? This is because I love my husband so much. So how can I accept he loves somebody else instead of me? It's a very though time for me to be alone while he is somewhere else loving another person. Is a man capable to make polygamy? This is a very hard question. Part of the answer is written in the holy Quran. There is a sentence where Allah ordered male to be fair with his wives. Then there is another sentence saying that Allah knows that a man cannot be a fair person for the rest of his life. So, why did Allah ordered male to be fair but at the same time He knows that a male cannot be fair?

The answer is Allah want a male to treat his wives on a equal ground. Don't make his wives hate each other. Divide his wealth to all his wives. However, it is a fate that the man's heart won't be equal. There must be one of his wives that he loves most instead of the others. Perhaps this answers the women's questionnaire of men's capability in polygamy. Yes, you are right. A man is not fully capable in polygamy. A man should consider a woman's feeling before making any decision.

Why would I raise this trouble causing topic? Well, firstly I hope you all understand that I'm not the one that agrees with polygamy. I don't just disagree but I also hate polygamy. There's is someone who is closed to me that married more than one wife (not my family). That fertilizes a little hatred in my heart to him. At first, I could see a little chaos in his family in the beginning. Then I started wondering what people’s perceptions in polygamy are?. Well, that is not enough. During last holiday, I play Garena (game connecting players all around Malaysia and other countries). I met a Chinese who is very anti with Malay and Islam. I beat him in the game and due to emotional manner, he wrote something foul to me. He said Malay #%$#$%#%$#%, Allah %$$$$% and so on. Then I debate with him about religion. I could answer almost all questions he gave. But when it comes to polygamy, it was tough. I'm still wondering how I can defend something that I hate most but my religion allows it.

When I came back to Indonesia, I asked someone expert about this and I opened the Quran to solve the puzzles. I do have some answers. Those were what I wrote in my last post. Well, frankly, I'm still anti with polygamy. That's why I'm really interested to be part of pot pet group. I'm hoping that I could find some answers. Perhaps, I may not understand women's feeling regarding this issue. But at least the best I could do is trying to understand. The one that we can expect to be responsible is the one that that can understand others (uuuuuuiiiiiiiiiiii).

Feeling like shit when someone quite like me writing such social topic. The person that I was referring to asked me "why not you raise the polygamy issues in your blog? Maybe that would help". Easy talking than doing. I do got some views. Mostly negative perceptions. Well, actually those are not what I was hoping. About the negative views on polygamy, I have plenty on my own. What I need from you girls are some explanations on something halal in your religion but you hate it very much. How can you answer questions like why Prophet Muhammad got married with many wives but only allows his ummah to have four?, do you think Islam treat females like slaves in polygamy? How you expect from a religion that allow you to love only one but allow your husband to love many?If you know that a man cannot be fair, then why your religion allow him to be in unfair manner?. Believe me; I even got questions tougher than these.

To be honest, I write this not as an apology but perhaps I could ask something even better than that, an understanding and some answers (mcm dialog dlm cite spiderman la pulak). How can you help me? Well, just simply fill in the comment section. Or perhaps write something in your own blog. I expect something good from resourceful persons that I know like Opie, Shudud, Fain or even FAIZUL. Thanks.

Yarkkkhhhs over!